Relentless: From Good to Great to Unstoppable

Relentless: From Good to Great to Unstoppable

Written by Tim S. Grover

Total notes 79

Most people are willing to settle for "good enough." But if you want to be unstoppable, those words mean nothing to you.
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Everything you need to be great is already inside you. All your ambitions and secrets, your darkest dreams… they're waiting for you to just let go
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… if you don't make a choice, the choice will be made for you
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Being relentless means demanding more of yourself than anyone else could ever demand of you, knowing that every time you stop, you can still do more. You must do more. 
 
The minute your mind thinks, "Done," your instincts say, "Next.
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… if you want to be unstoppable, you have to face who you really are and make it work for you, not against you.
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… anything that requires a long explanation probably isn't the truth.
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In order to have what you really want, you must first be who you really are
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Being relentless means never being satisfied. It means creating new goals every time you reach your personal best.
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If you want to be great, deliver the unexpected. If you want to be the best, deliver a miracle.
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Remember, it's not about talent or brains or wealth. It's about the relentless instinctive drive to do whatever it takes-anything-to get to the top of where you want to be, and to stay there. 
… 
A Cleaner's attitude can be summed up in three words: I own this. He walks in with confidence and leaves with results.
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Those who reach this level of excellence don't coast on their talent. They're completely focused on taking responsibility and taking charge, …; they decide how to get the job done, and then they do whatever is necessary to make it happen.
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They expect to succeed, and when they do, they never celebrate for long because there's always more to do.
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Cleaners have a dark side, and a zone you can't enter. 
 
They get what they want, but they pay for it in solitude. 
 
Excellence is lonely.
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Cleaners understand they don't have to love the work to be successful; they just have to be relentless about achieving it, and everything else in between is a diversion and a distraction from the ultimate prize.
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It's not necessary-or even possible-to be a Cleaner in all aspects of your life. You don't have to be relentless about everything, you don't have to be the best at everything.
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All that matters is the end result, not the instant gratification along the way.
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At the highest level of success in any area, everyone has reached some degree of outstanding achievement, so we're talking about shades of greatness. But if you want to be the very best of the best, it's the details that make the difference.
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you can't train your body-or excel at anything-before you train your mind. You can't commit to excellence until your mind is ready to take you there. 
 
Teach the mind to train the body.
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Do. The. Work. Every day, you have to do something you don't want to do. Every day. Challenge yourself to be uncomfortable, push past the apathy and laziness and fear.

Notes -

Remember David Goggins
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Cleaners do the hardest things first, just to show there's no task too big. They might not be happy about it, they don't ever love it, but they're always thinking about the destination, not the bumpy road that takes them there
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You control your body, it does not control you. You shut out the fear and emotion and physical stress and you do the thing you dread.
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But I'm not going to make it comfortable. Why should I? Comfortable makes you good. We're going for unstoppable, and there's a price to pay for that.
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Get comfortable being uncomfortable, or find another place to fail.
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No emotion, because in the Zone the only sensation is anger, a quiet, icy anger simmering under your skin never rage, never out of control. Silent, like a storm that moves in slow and dark, its violence unseen until it hits, and can't be measured until it moves on.
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Most people are the lion in the cage. Safe, tame, predictable, waiting for something to happen. But for humans, the cage isn't made of glass and steel bars; it's made of bad advice and low selfesteem and bullshit rules and tortured thinking about what you can't do or what you're supposed to do. It's molded around you by a lifetime of overthinking and overanalyzing and worrying about what could go wrong. Stay in the cage long enough, you forget those basic instincts.
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If you think, you die.

Notes -

Remember “Warfighting” - Marines doctrine book
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The greats never stop learning. Instinct and talent without technique just makes you reckless… . 
 
Instinct is raw clay that can be shaped into a masterpiece, if you develop skills that match your talent. That can only come from learning everything there is to know about what you do. 
 
But real learning doesn't mean clinging to the lessons. 
 
It means absorbing everything you can and then trusting yourself to use what you know instantaneously, without thinking. Instinctive, not impulsive … quick, not hurried.
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I'm not telling you to stop searching for answers. But learn about yourself, and then trust what you know so you can build on what you already have. 
 
(Instinct is the opposite of science: research tells you what others have learned, instinct tells you what you have learned. Science studies other people. Instinct is all about you.)
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You get there by taking huge risks that others won't take, because you rely on your instincts to know which risks aren't risks at all.
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Staying safe means being limited, and you can't be limited if you're going to be relentless.
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Unapologetically embrace the dark side. Be sure you control it, and not be the one controlled by it. 
 
Ignore judgement of others, your dark side is what makes you a killer. 
 
If exposed to light, never apologize. Instead embrace it and double down. Don't give-in to the mob.
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As soon as they start relaxing for just a moment, they instantly feel as if they're slacking. 
… 
To a Cleaner, relaxing is something weaker people do because they can't handle pressure.
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Remember, don't compete with anyone, you make them compete with you. 
…focus only on the internal pressure that drives you. Run to it, embrace it, feel it, so no one else can throw more at you than you've already put on yourself
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Stress is what brings you to life. Let it motivate you, make you work harder. Use it, don't run from it. When it makes you uncomfortable, so what? The payoff is worth it. Work through the discomfort, you'll survive. And then go back for more. 
 
Of course, you have to be able to recognize the difference between stress that can bring great results, and stress you create yourself that just causes chaos.
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Feel that pressure, and fight to stay there. You have to work for that. It's not owed to you.
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…confidence means recognizing something isn't working and having the flexibility and knowledge to make adjustments; cockiness is the inability to admit when something isn't working, and repeating the same mistakes over and over because you stubbornly can't admit you're wrong.
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A Cooler takes no risks. 
 
A Closer takes risks when he can prepare in advance and knows the consequences of failing are minimal. 
 
Nothing feels risky to a Cleaner; whatever happens, he'll know what to do.
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If you're a Cleaner, you know that feeling, and you've likely been in that kind of situation when everyone else is freaking out and you just know what to do. You don't even know how you know, you just know. I'm not talking about "winging it" or making it up as you go. I'm talking about being so prepared, with so many options and so much experience, that you're truly ready for anything.
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You have to be willing to fail if you're going to trust yourself to act from the gut, and then adapt as you go. 
 
That's the confidence or swagger that allows you to take risks and know that whatever happens, you'll figure it out. Adapt, and adapt again.
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You want to know a true sign of a Cleaner? He feels no pressure when he screws up and has no problem admitting when he's wrong and shouldering the blame: When a Cooler makes a mistake, he'll give you a lot of excuses but no solutions. 
When a Closer makes a mistake, he finds someone else to blame. 
When a Cleaner makes a mistake, he can look in the you eye and say, "I fucked up.”
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Are there times when you truly have no control? 
 
Absolutely. But at that point, it's on you to figure out how to take charge and navigate forward. Otherwise, you're allowing external pressure to dictate the outcome. 
 
Create your own pressure to succeed, don't allow others to create it for you. Have the confidence to trust that you can handle anything.
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What the hell is "inner drive"? Inner drive is nothing more than thought without action, internal wanderings that never hit the pavement to go anywhere. Completely worthless until those thoughts become external and convert to action.
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Passion: a strong feeling or emotion for something or someone. Very nice. Now what? Are you just feeling it, or are you going to do something about it? 
 
I love hearing motivational speakers tell people to "follow passion." Follow it? How about work at it. Excel at it. Demand to be the best at it.
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Trust yourself. Decide. 
 
Every minute, every hour, every day that you sit around trying to figure out what to do, someone else is already doing it.
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Thinking doesn’t achieve outcomes, only action does. Prepare yourself with everything you'll need to succeed, then act. 
 
You don't need a hundred people to back you up and be your safety net. Your preparation and your instincts are your safety net.
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Good things come to those who wait. 
 
No; good things come to those who work. I understand the value of not rushing into things—you want to be quick, not careless— but you still have to work toward a result, not just sit back and wait for something to happen.
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Meanwhile, as you sit back doing nothing because you're afraid to make a mistake, someone else is out there making all kinds of mistakes, learning from them, and getting to where you wanted to be. And probably laughing at your weakness.
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Figure out what you do, then do it. And do it better than anyone else.
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Interesting how the guy with the most talent and success spent more time working out than anyone else.
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Do you need to be pain-free? Or can you push past it and stand by your commitment and decision to go further? It's your choice. 
 
The outcome is on you.
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Making it to the top is not the same as making it at the top.
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Cleaner Law: when you reduce your competition to whining that you "got lucky," you know you're doing something right. 
 
…It's not about luck, I don't believe in luck. There are facts and opportunities and realities, and how you respond to them determines whether you succeed or fail.
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It doesn't matter what you get handed, it's what you do after you receive it that affords you the privilege of saying, "I did this on my own."
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You cannot understand what it means to be relentless until you have struggled to possess something that's just out of your reach. 
 
Over and over, as soon as you touch it, it moves farther away. But something inside you that killer instinct-makes you keep going, reaching, until you finally grab it and fight with all your might to keep holding on. Anyone can take what's sitting right in front of him. Only when you're truly relentless can you understand the determination to keep pursuing a target that never stops moving.
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If you want to be elite, you have to earn it. Every day, everything you do. Earn it. Prove it. Sacrifice. 
 
No shortcuts. You can't fight the elephants until you've wrestled the pigs, messed around in the mud, handled the scrappy, dirty issues that clutter everyday life, so you can be ready for the heavy stuff later. There's no way you can be prepared to compete and survive at anything if you start with the elephants; no matter how good your instincts are, you'll always lack the basic knowledge needed to build your arsenal of attack weapons. And when you're surrounded by those elephants, they'll know they're looking at a desperate newcomer.
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Anyone can start something. Few can finish.
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Part of the commitment to hard work is knowing what you have to give up to do the work… learning to control whatever pulls you away from your mission.
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Cleaner Law: When you're going through a world of pain, you never hide. 
You show up to work ready to go, you face adversity and your critics and those who judge you, you step into the Zone and perform at that top level when everyone is expecting you to falter. That's being a professional.
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When people start broadcasting what they're going to do, and how great they're going to be when they do it, it's a sure sign they're still trying to convince themselves.
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respect isn't just about what you can do physically; you have to be able to perform intellectually and mentally as well. The way you conduct yourself in all areas of your life, your ability to show intelligence and class and self-control those are the things that separate you from the rest of the pack.
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You don't need a $3,000 suit, go to Walmart and buy three for $100, but come back looking like a man, not a kid who got kicked out of school.
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You can't get to the top without stepping on some people, but a Cleaner knows where to step without leaving footprints, because you never know when you may need those people again. 
 
Being feared doesn't mean being a jerk. I want you to carry yourself so you can be respected, not exposed as an insecure jackass who big-times others so he can feel better about himself.
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…if you’re truly focused on winning, you’re not concerned with friendship or compassion or loyalty, you're not worried about how others will judge you. 
 
You know what people say about you, and it just drives you harder. Let them hate you; it only shows their weakness and emotion and makes you more powerful. 
 
You don't need friends; your friends need you. You know whom and they'd better never let you down
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…about trusting your instincts to make decisions, … a big part of that is knowing whom you can trust, or whether you can trust anyone at all. 
 
Because no matter who you are, part of success means recognizing the people who can help you get where you want to go, putting all the best pieces in place. 
 
You have to surround yourself with people who can operate at your level of demanding excellence. You can't be unstoppable, or even great, if you can't do that. And it's probably the hardest thing for a Cleaner to do.
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A Cleaner views people as if they're tools, each with unique, indispensable qualities. 
… 
You're only as good as the tools you've chosen, and your ability to use them to their maximum potential. 
 
That's a Cleaner's talent, gathering the best possible assets, placing them exactly where they have to be, and if necessary, moving them into specific situations for his benefit. Cleaners are meticulous about putting their key people in place; they'll take a long time to build that ideal team, but when they finally get everyone they need, they stay committed to keeping the team intact.
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Someone asks you to do something you don't want to do, and you start explaining, that person is going to ask and again and again. 
Don't explain, don't make excuses, Truth takes one sentence. Simple and direct.
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Be open to advice that goes against what you want. 
 
Cleaner Law: surround yourself with those who want you to succeed, who recognize what it takes to be successful. People who don't pursue their own dreams probably won't encourage you to pursue yours; they'll tell you every negative thing they tell themselves.
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You don't recognize failure; 
you know there's more than one way 
to get what you want.

Notes -

Similar thought expressed in Rick Rubin’s book— a failure is a road that will show you sides that you’ve never knew existed.
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If you don't succeed at everything you do on your first attempt, does that mean you "failed"? Isn't it a good thing that you keep coming back and working at it until you succeed? How can that be failure? 
 
What most people think of as failure, a Cleaner sees as an opportunity to manage and control a situation, pulling it around to his advantage, doing something everyone else says is impossible.
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Failure is what happens when you decide you failed. Until then, you're still always looking for ways to get to where you want to be.
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Success and failure are 100 percent mental. One per son's idea of success might seem like a complete failure to someone else. You must establish your own vision of what it means to be unstoppable, you can't let anyone else define that for you. 
 
What does your gut tell you? What do your instincts know about what you should be doing how you're going to succeed, and what you're going to succeed at? How can anyone tell you what that should be?
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That's the progression of good-great-unstoppable. No one starts at unstoppable. 
 
You fuck up, you figure it out, you trust yourself.
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(A Cleaner) He doesn't feel embarrassed or ashamed, he doesn't blame anyone else, and he doesn't care what anyone else says about his situation. It's never the end, it's never over. 
 
And he knows, without a doubt, that whatever happens, he'll find a way to come out on top.
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If you aim at excellence, you have to be willing to sacrifice. That is the price of success. You never know how bad you want it until you get that first bitter taste of not getting it, but once you taste it, you're going to fight like hell to get that bitterness out of your mouth.
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A Cleaner can't ever accept that it's over. But he does recognize when it's time to change direction. 
 
One of the hardest things to do is to change course once you've set your goals. You made a decision, you worked for it, you earned the payoff but for whatever reason, it's not going the way you planned. 
 
It's not weak to recognize when it's time to shift directions. 
 
It's weak to refuse to consider other options and fail at everything because you couldn't adapt to anything.
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It takes a special person to say enough is enough and know when it's time to start redirecting your effort into something that can succeed. Maybe your dream isn't going to play out the way you originally envisioned it, but with some creativity and vision you can redirect your goals toward something that keeps you connected to what you always wanted.
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A Cleaner feels burnout like everyone else, but the idea of walking away and not thinking about what he walked away from creates more anxiety and stress than keeping it going.
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I want the satisfaction of knowing that every move make, every thought, every idea, every action takes further than anyone else has ever gone and makes me better at what I do than anyone else in the world. That's what drives me. Whatever drives you, let it take you where you want to be. Everything you want can be yours. Be a Cleaner and go get it. 
 
Be relentless. 
Done. 
Next.

Notes -

Never listen to those people that says to take it safe. There are no limitations other than those you give yourself. If something isn't working, move around it and over. Success isn’t a straight path. There will be times when what you are trying isn't working. Move to the next tactic, to the next path to success. Never stop. No limitations.
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When you have to trust yourself and believe what you feel, not what you see. 
 
Sometimes you take those steps one at a time, sometimes two at a time. Some days you'll feel so good you'll want to sprint, other days you're crawling on your hands and knees, gasping for breath and wishing you'd never started this race. You'll slip and tumble and lose everything you just gained. 
 
And when you finally make some progress more steps to climb. There's a pebble in your shoe, a blister on every toe. Your lungs want to explode. Every day. Every damn day. 
 
Ten steps? Wouldn't that be nice. "Ten steps" are a convenient way to simplify and sell success, but hardly effective.

Notes -

Extract from “W1nning”
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